i love being a woman. love being all curvy and soft and stuff. but i absofreakinlutely hate my period!!! geeeez! cramps all up and down my back. loose bowels. irritable. uuuuugggh! why lawd wwwwhhhhyyy!! i think that after you have a kid, your baby daddy should get your period. i mean we had to go thru the 9 months of carrying the child. then have to push that child outta your woowoo. then breastfeed. stretch marks. weight gain. skin changes. what they hell do they get? slaps on the back and a cigar! rat bastards! aaaaand i think that jobs should have "period leave". 5 paid days off so you can stay balled up in your bed, gnawing on chocolate while watching some mindless daytime tv. and these damn ibuprofen ain't about shit!! dammit i have taken about a million of these bitches and i'm still in pain! thinking about crossing over to the hood and getting me some crack to dull this ache!
bras... who thought of this madness? had to be a fracklenaggle man. why the hell do i wanna smother my tits? there's nothing like popping your bra off at the end of the day. it's damn near orgasmic! pop it off and scratch. wooooo! and if you're smiling cause you know what i'm talking about.
i don't really do heels but i do know that they can be muuuurder on the feet! yes, they are sexy and make your ass look like "pow!" but they are little death traps!
all things about being a woman aren't bad. we can cry ans get sympathy. we can get mani pedis and not have it be thought weird. we are the bearers of life. we are the backbones of the family.... yada yada yada.... i just want these gotdamn cramps gone!!!! now where's my heating pad and blanket?
giiiiiiirl! I think there should be an option to stop periods as soon as you have you're first child, especially if you don't plan on having anymore.
ReplyDeletetruth, truth, and more truth!
Girl I think you need to take that period leave to the Supreme Court!!! I don't get periods anymore, but when I did a sista really coulda been right in da bed doing exactly what you said!!!
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